The World Says Move On And I Ask , How?

When a relationship fails—especially between two individuals—unexpected events unfold. This is so because when a relationship is blooming, neither of the two parties bother to prepare themselves for the period when either of them would have to do without the other person in question.

That scenario is never entertained. In fact, a mere mention of the possibility of such a happenstance is considered a jinx. The fear of a relationship breaking up at seams is so high that when it actually takes place, we are scared beyond reality and scarred beyond imagination. It's quite palpable that not both the parties would have the same inclination towards each other. One of the two would very well—like they love to say nowadays—"move on" in style although that's something I'm yet to grasp.

How can people move on? Especially when you've invested time, energy and the potion called love into one person for an interesting amount of time. Especially when a piece of you is left in that person who has apparently moved on and you're supposed to move on from. Especially when it felt so real and eternal.

Maybe that's why it hurts one fine evening when you weren't expecting the memories to flood in. Because you thought you were done. Surprise, surprise! You never were and you never will be. That's not how a human heart works. We are animals, yes, but we are not the kind that takes a life for granted. We are the ones who look into each other's eyes and synchronize heartbeat. I shudder to imagine how it'd feel like when two heartbeats are out of sync.

Memories

The idea of disappointing her troubles him. So what does our hero do? He ponders. Deeply. About the various possibilities that lay ahead of them. This makes him starkly pessimistic but utterly realistic.

Success has been alien to him for the major part of his life. So he goes ahead with the thought "I don't wish to disappoint her...blah bla" and then does what he has to do. At least what he presumes he has to do. Guess what he does. He creates memories. Loads of them. Good, bad, silly, forgettable. But he creates them with her as sincerely as possible. Because at the end of the day, they aren't in a worldly relationship. They don't stick to labels or vice versa. They are what the purists can call soul mates. And they might be mistaken too. What they can't be wrong about are the memories. Besides, you can't add an ex- to memories.

Memories flourish whether you like them or not. The thought process involved is almost sacred. Like them. Perhaps why he thinks "I don't want to disappoint her again...blah bla" before going back to her. Repeatedly.

Strangers in the night

One rainy night, he looked out of his window and then peeked into himself. The contrast between crowd and loneliness was evident like never before. He pondered for a minute and then took out his smartphone to foolishly text "I think I'm falling for you!" to an unsuspecting female friend. She, on the other side of the town, picked up her cellphone in return and read his loud message under her noiseless breath. Since chivalry was synonymous with this guy, it was bit of a shock to her to receive something as straightforward as this from a person like him. Well, love indeed makes people act in irreversibly weird ways. So she too decided to act weirder and didn't reply a word. But then she couldn't sleep either and the same was true about her poor cellphone. After all, she kept reading the message again and again as if it revealed her entire future. In the end, she replied "Think again!" unlocking a brand new gate of conversation.

Lost in Words

I keep revisiting my childhood; not because I have an eidetic memory (which I don't, anyway) but because some of my finest days dwell deep down in my past. They weren't colorful as such. They weren't poetic either. They were rustic for a while before getting fondled by urban chaos. Despite all that, they had an innocent charm about themselves. Or maybe I'm thinking too much and creating images that weren't there in the first place. Its fine, I assume, to ponder from one thread of long-forgotten incidents to another. The trouble, however, begins when you start living more in your yesterdays and stop looking forward to your tomorrows. We are part of an age where imagination is dirt cheap but petrol, shit expensive. So one has to think twice before choosing their mode of transport. I prefer mind-traveling. After all, our generation is way ahead of its time machine. To be honest, I don't know what I'm writing here but the voices in my head suggest that it's OK to be lost in words. Nobody cares what you wrote but people care far lesser for what you haven't.   

Love And Fraandship In The Time Of Facebook

Relationships are tricky in real life. Real Life is already complicated and it is getting increasing difficult to understand in guys and girls really mean when they say something. For example girl says 'yes; when she means 'no' and guy says 'yes/no/maybe' but means 'can I get laid?' Thankfully, there are enough experts, from Dr D.K.Lodh to Ashmit Patel, to help us understand what it all means.

But what happens when relationships, love and friendship go on Facebook? In reality, these days I don't give a shit but there was a time when rejecting a girl's friends request was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.......hard. But fear not there are still some retards who think they can get laid through facebook. Lets see a case study:

When a random person from the opposite sex on Facebook adds you:
What it means for single girl: Ooh, one more friend on Facebook.. yay, now I have 678 friends! I beat *random evil girl*
What it means for single guy: WOO HOO!!!!! This chick likes me, this chick likes me!! *Does vulgar Anil Kapoor Oscar speech dance*
What it means for committed girl: Ooh, one more friend on Facebook.. yay, now I have 678 friends! I beat *random evil girl*
What it means for committed guy: WOO HOO!!!! Girls STILL want me! Oooh I'm so hot and happenin' baby! *Dances like Justin Bieber in ‘Baby baby baby'*
When a person from opposite sex changes Relationship Status to ‘Single':
What it means for single girl: Awww
What it means for single guy: *Immediately comments* (In sympathetic tone) Heyyyy… I'm so sorry to hear that. What happened with your boyfriend? I hope you are alright. My number is 912345678, you should call me if you are sad and need someone to talk to. Please take care, please. I can't see you hurt. (*Thinking: REBOUND SEX, REBOUND SEX, REBOUND SEX FTW!!*)
What it means for committed girl: Awww
What it means for committed guy: ANOTHER girl's single now!! What the hell!! When I was single EVERYONE was with someone else! This is SO unfair!! Why does it always happen to me!! I hate life. I HATE life. I H-A-T-E life. F**k this s**t. !@#$
When a new, sexy profile pic of the opposite sex pops up on the ‘wall':
What it means for single girl: Ooh, I should change my profile pic too! It's been so long since the last time I updated… today morning. Hmm, which one should I put? The one where my hair is on my face and people can only see that bit of me that looks pretty? Or the one where I look super sexy but it's nothing like how I am in real life? Or wait, I think I should just put photos of my feet. They are so pwetty! *Changes pic*
What it means for single guy: Woah, sexy pic, yaar! Yaar, this girl is so hot. I wish she was going out with me. I wish I was not single. I wish I had sex with someone besides my hand. Should I comment on it? What if she thinks I am desperate? I AM desperate but what if that becomes obvious? Maybe I should not comment on the pic, she's already fraandship with my Facebook, I don't want to spoil that relationship. (Thinks a lot more) *Likes pic, to play it safe*
What it means for commited girl: Ooh, I should change my profile pic too! It's been so long since the last time I updated… today morning. Hmm, which one should I put? The one where my hair is on my face and people can only see that bit of me that looks pretty? Or the one where I look super sexy but it's nothing like how I am in real life? Or wait, I think I should just put photos of my feet. They are so pwetty! *Changes pic*
What it means for committed guy: Niiiiice! I bet I'd have got her if I'd have been single. Dammit, I'm not single :(. No one night stands for me :(. I hate life :(. I wish I was in America, people there are so open-minded, they don't mind multiple partners also. India SUCKS. Life SUCKS. Commitment SUCKS. *Starts crying*
When a person from opposite sex compliments you on your new profile pic
What it means for single girl: *Giggles to herself* Yay, another comment! Total of 26 comments now, I'm popular! *Polishes her tiara*
What it means for single guy: Score! I'm going to get LAID!!! Finally!!!!
What it means for commited girl: *Giggles to herself* Yay, another comment! Total of 26 comments now, I'm popular! *Polishes her tiara*
What it means for committed guy: She's TOTALLY into me! Aaja meri gaadi mein baith ja, baby. Man, I wish I didn't have a girlfriend! (Pause) Oh fuck, my girlfriend's going to read this! What do I do now!! I'm screwed!! I mean.. I won't be now :(
And finally, if you are having trouble making sense of all this brilliant advice we have doled out, here's what you do next:
If you are a single girl: Share this article with your friends (and STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF YOUR FEET on your profile)
If you are a single guy: Share this article with your friends (and stop stalking girls online – ultimately, arranged marriage is there na, you'll still get sex!)
If you are a committed girl: Share this article with your friends (and forgive your boyfriend… it's not his fault, he was born like that… a GUY)
If you are a committed guy: Share this article with your friends (and make sure your girlfriend doesn't read it)